a step-monster more than a step-mother. I don't know if it's him or me today, but Meyson and I just cannot seem to see eye-to-eye. I started the day hopeful because our morning seemed to be going well, but then right before lunch is when things started to go downhill and fast!
I was getting ready to make something for lunch, when Meyson starts asking for another snack. I said "no" to the first request so he continued with a second, a little more persistent this time.
"Can I have a piece of cheese? Piece of cheese! Piece of cheese! Piece of cheese! Cheese!"
Keep in mind, that constant "pestering" is something that Meyson struggles with on a regular basis, so it's not a new concept for him to know that he shouldn't do it. I sternly told him "no" and when he started to go back to playing, I called him back to have yet another conversation about his repetitive requests.
"What are you supposed to do when someone doesn't answer you right away?"
"Not talk to them" (The answer I was looking for was more along the lines of "not keep asking" but that was close enough for me)
"What are you not supposed to do?"
"I don't know"
"I need a better answer. I know you're smart enough to give me a better answer"
"I don't know" (this time in a whiney voice)
From then on, the last part of the conversation kept repeating itself and each time getting more and more whiney. This is when I sent him to the corner for not giving me an answer and for doing something that he knows that he's not supposed to be doing. That sent him into hysterics. He started screaming, hitting and kicking the walls, and begging me to either take him to his mom's house or let him to go his room. I tried to ignore him because I know that's what I'm "supposed" to do, but I finally hit my breaking point and told him that he could go ahead and go to his room, but that I had a job for him. I gave him a tote and made him put all remaining toys in it. He's already had most of his toys taken away already for bad behavior so there weren't many left.
This, of course, sent him into an even worse tantrum, but he did put the toys in the tote and when I took the toys from his room, I told him to sit on his bed facing the wall. He listened to my command, but not without a fight. The kicking, hitting and screaming started all over again and this time he added in bouncing on the bed. This time I did just ignore him and eventually he ended up wearing himself out and crashing and is still asleep right now. (Thank god!!!)
I am at a complete loss of what to do at this point. I've tried every type of reasonable punishment that I can think of and nothing seems to be working. I'm trying to keep a positive attitude with/about him, but there are some days that I am so tempted to let him get what he wants when he begs to go to his mom's. Maybe tomorrow will be a better day...
Showing posts with label step-parenting. Show all posts
Showing posts with label step-parenting. Show all posts
Saturday, July 23, 2011
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
A New Chapter
It's official: We're TTC (trying to conceive) and I couldn't be more excited. :)
Even though I've been pregnant twice (one live birth and one miscarriage), this will be the first time that I've planned a pregnancy. We were originally going to wait until the end of the summer to TTC, but things just feel right now and I know in my heart, that we're ready. Aside from that gut feeling, things are coming together for us in other ways and I feel that now my journey is going to be less stressful.
A big factor for me was our financial stability. I was worried that we wouldn't be able to support another LO (little one), but things are looking up in that department. Eric (my BF) is doing really well at his new job and even got a bonus last Friday (Yay!). Plus, he has decided to continue with his original job that lays off during summer time as well as keep this new job. He's going to be working two jobs so that I am able to stay home like I wanted to. I made the transition from working mom to SAHM (stay-at-home mom) in March and I'm not gonna lie, it hasn't always been easy. Thankfully, Eric was able to find another job quickly and started even before his layoff happened in the summer. Now, he has talked to his bosses at both jobs, and will be able to continue both of them (only one part time so that he's not gone ALL the time).
Another thing that has been in the back of my head is our situation with his son Meyson. According to the custody agreement with Eric's ex, they are to co-parent and each have Meyson equal amounts of time. In reality, for the past three years, we have had him most of the time, which is not a problem. The problem is that his schedule keeps getting more relaxed and there's never set time or day for pick-up or drop-off. I told Eric that I will not bring a new life into a situation with such lack of structure. It already takes a toll on the two kids that are already here and that I will not willingly subject another child to it. Kids need at least some type of schedule so that they know what's going on from day to day. Eric agrees with me and is talking with Meyson's BM (biomom) to get a schedule set that is going to be appropriate and work for both of them.
Something else that wasn't really a deciding factor, but helped a lot to make my decision easier, is Olivia's potty training. When Olivia was born, Meyson was still in diapers/pull ups and it made it a lot harder and more expensive. Luckily, a couple months later, he was potty trained in like a day, but this time I wanted to make sure that Olivia was at least on the right track with her potty training before the baby would be born. Plus, I remember that changing some of Meyson's poopy diapers was hell on my weak stomach during my first trimester!
Finally, the last and probably most important factor in my decision was being healthy both physically and mentally. We experienced a loss in April and I was devastated. It was an unplanned pregnancy and I was only 6 weeks, but still I already loved my baby just as much as I love the kids I have here on earth. It took time and even counseling to help me deal with my loss and I am finally at a place that I feel ready to try for my rainbow baby. And just as I am excited to start trying, I'm also scared that history will repeat itself, which is why I'm doing everything in my power to create a healthy pregnancy. I'm completely changing my diet. I've already cut out caffeine, with the exception of the small amounts in decaf coffee and tea and in chocolate, all in moderation. I'm also working to maintain a healthier weight, switching to whole grains, drinking lots more water, putting more fruits and veggies in my diet and just in general trying to stick to a healthier diet.
I've been charting and keeping track of my cycles and BT (basal temperature) on My Monthly Cycles and according to my calender, this week is my most fertile week of this month. :) I'm making it my goal to DTD (do the deed) at least once a day every day this week (maybe 2 or 3 if I'm feeling extra frisky lol).
Even though I've been pregnant twice (one live birth and one miscarriage), this will be the first time that I've planned a pregnancy. We were originally going to wait until the end of the summer to TTC, but things just feel right now and I know in my heart, that we're ready. Aside from that gut feeling, things are coming together for us in other ways and I feel that now my journey is going to be less stressful.
A big factor for me was our financial stability. I was worried that we wouldn't be able to support another LO (little one), but things are looking up in that department. Eric (my BF) is doing really well at his new job and even got a bonus last Friday (Yay!). Plus, he has decided to continue with his original job that lays off during summer time as well as keep this new job. He's going to be working two jobs so that I am able to stay home like I wanted to. I made the transition from working mom to SAHM (stay-at-home mom) in March and I'm not gonna lie, it hasn't always been easy. Thankfully, Eric was able to find another job quickly and started even before his layoff happened in the summer. Now, he has talked to his bosses at both jobs, and will be able to continue both of them (only one part time so that he's not gone ALL the time).
Another thing that has been in the back of my head is our situation with his son Meyson. According to the custody agreement with Eric's ex, they are to co-parent and each have Meyson equal amounts of time. In reality, for the past three years, we have had him most of the time, which is not a problem. The problem is that his schedule keeps getting more relaxed and there's never set time or day for pick-up or drop-off. I told Eric that I will not bring a new life into a situation with such lack of structure. It already takes a toll on the two kids that are already here and that I will not willingly subject another child to it. Kids need at least some type of schedule so that they know what's going on from day to day. Eric agrees with me and is talking with Meyson's BM (biomom) to get a schedule set that is going to be appropriate and work for both of them.
Something else that wasn't really a deciding factor, but helped a lot to make my decision easier, is Olivia's potty training. When Olivia was born, Meyson was still in diapers/pull ups and it made it a lot harder and more expensive. Luckily, a couple months later, he was potty trained in like a day, but this time I wanted to make sure that Olivia was at least on the right track with her potty training before the baby would be born. Plus, I remember that changing some of Meyson's poopy diapers was hell on my weak stomach during my first trimester!
Finally, the last and probably most important factor in my decision was being healthy both physically and mentally. We experienced a loss in April and I was devastated. It was an unplanned pregnancy and I was only 6 weeks, but still I already loved my baby just as much as I love the kids I have here on earth. It took time and even counseling to help me deal with my loss and I am finally at a place that I feel ready to try for my rainbow baby. And just as I am excited to start trying, I'm also scared that history will repeat itself, which is why I'm doing everything in my power to create a healthy pregnancy. I'm completely changing my diet. I've already cut out caffeine, with the exception of the small amounts in decaf coffee and tea and in chocolate, all in moderation. I'm also working to maintain a healthier weight, switching to whole grains, drinking lots more water, putting more fruits and veggies in my diet and just in general trying to stick to a healthier diet.
I've been charting and keeping track of my cycles and BT (basal temperature) on My Monthly Cycles and according to my calender, this week is my most fertile week of this month. :) I'm making it my goal to DTD (do the deed) at least once a day every day this week (maybe 2 or 3 if I'm feeling extra frisky lol).
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